Ramblings of Ingratitude

Craig and I booked a cruise a while back with some great friends. It leaves at the end of February. Craig's family is sweet enough to keep Riley for the WEEK. I'm ungrateful for this time to spend with my husband and a chance to be selfish. I'm ungrateful that George and Laura will keep him for a week. I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE MY LITTLE BOY! Craig has threatened to cancel the cruise...lol. Not that you can do that, you can not show up at this point and lose your money. I've offered that he can just remove half my heart and maybe I won't care. It's a very difficult thing for me. As he's walking around my chair jabbering right now I think I can't possibly leave him.
I've talked to A LOT of people about it at this point. Some who have done it and don't think it's a big deal at all and others who would never. I think I'm a "would never" kind of person and Craig is a it's a "no big deal" kind of person. I'm not sure either is right or wrong, but perhaps a blend of personality and what's typical in your families.
I'm not a super emotional person, but I want to cry whenever I think about it. I WANT to want to go. I hope George and Laura are prepared for helping Craig drag me away kicking and screaming (probably literally!)
I've also heard too many stories of people who have left their little ones and got snubbed upon returning. If Riley is not excited to see me when I get back there will be more tears.
I think having moved to a new place soon after Riley has made me extra attached. We don't do things without each other
I know some people would give anything to have a week away! Why is this so hard for me? I don't think Mom's are bad moms that leave their kids, but I feel like a bad Mom. Sorry for the ramblings...